A Rug, A Halloween Cartoon, and. Nightmare at the Door

What makes you uncomfortable?

The feeling of uncomfort is something in our society that we run away from, but throughout my work I run towards it in the aim of opening conversations primarily about common health issues but through out my capstone I decided to explore what makes me uncomfortable, my family trauma, and doing so I aim to open avenues of conversation to promote education and understanding about domestic violence and sexual abuse.

Most of my childhood is a blank space in which I only remember a rug, a halloween Tom and Jerry special, and someone constantly at my door way. This figure has haunted me for all of my life and into adulthood, I have been running from my boogieman sense since I was a child, but I never knew why and why I was so terrified.

Family trauma is something many people are far too familiar with, weather from domestic violence, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, and more. My family is no stranger to family abuse, it has chased everyone in my family, ever lurking like a figure in a horror film.

My boogie man was my father, I had countless nightmares, panic attacks, and general fear of him since I was a young girl. This work explores my memories of my own trauma through the small gaps of memory I have from that time period of my life. I have recreated my memories into a physical form covered in a suspicious red substance. This red infection of space is the disease of trauma and how it has had a hold on my life for so long, controlling everything I do. This space is emulating nostalgia but from a place of fear and complacency, I have decided this fear will no longer control my life and I will wash the red goo from myself.

Who is your boogie man?

I began exploring this topic because I felt like there was a lack of art talking about domestic violence, sexual assault, and the traditional American family. I found that much of what I was seeing in term of subject matter that was discussing these topic was shallow and lacked honesty. This lead me to use my won family trauma of watching my mother get abused and berated, including hiding in a ditch from my own father out of fear as well as my experiences of sexual abuse at the hands of my father.

My father created a boogieman of fear that has followed me through out my life, but for the first time I want to stop running away from him, and use my trauma s a way to open conversations and avenues of connection for survivors.

This subject matter is something I want to continue to explore after my capstone, while most of my pro-folio ficuses on chronic illness and common health issues, I believe America is sick with the complacency of domestic violence and sexual abuse. Rape culture is at the root of our country and so many turn a blind eye to what is really going on behind closed doors. My goal is to open that conversation further into what is really going on in your home, your neighbors home, or a friends.

Would you turn a blind eye?

National Domestic Violence Hotline

800-799-7233

National Sexual Assault Hotline

1-800-656-4673